Toxic Tango: Dancing with Hate and Healing
Toxic emotions, actions, and relationships can be profoundly unsettling, and it is an experience many of us have faced. This episode delves into the intricate nature of hate and its subtle ways of infiltrating our lives, often disguised as something less apparent. It examines the complexities of these emotions and their potential ties to self-worth and the connections we form with others. Have you ever experienced a persistent feeling of disdain, whether directed at someone else or yourself? This phenomenon is more common than we might care to acknowledge. This discussion encourages reflection on these feelings, an exploration of their origins, and the possibility of transforming toxic energy into something constructive. Prepare to engage in a candid exploration of these challenging aspects of life while seeking paths toward growth and understanding.
- It's crucial to recognize that even low-energy feelings can indicate a need for emotional growth.
- When dealing with toxic feelings, we often need to confront our own shadows first before pointing fingers.
- Words carry energy, so it's important to choose them wisely to avoid perpetuating negativity.
- Compassion is the antidote to hate, both for ourselves and in our relationships with others.
Transcript
All right.
Speaker A:Hi, I'm Mac the mad monk, your host.
Speaker A:Welcome to the Wise Guys, a podcast where we unleash the unthinkable, see things differently, and shatter the norms to help us do it just a little bit better.
Speaker A:Because here's a good.
Speaker A:An honest truth.
Speaker A:The old gods are dead.
Speaker B:Lowercase gods, right.
Speaker A:And the new ones haven't even shown up sober.
Speaker A:So we forge our path in the chaos with reverence, with rage and affliction.
Speaker A:Flask full of grace.
Speaker C:I'll carry the reference.
Speaker B:I don't want any rage.
Speaker A:I'll take the flask.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker B:I'm not taking the rage.
Speaker B:Come on, man.
Speaker C:Default.
Speaker A:But with me, of course, are my co conspirators.
Speaker A:I kind of like that we started seeing that.
Speaker A:But you guys, my wise guys, okay, we got Coach Stu.
Speaker B:Hey, hey.
Speaker A:And the ref.
Speaker C:Good to see you.
Speaker C:Good to see you guys.
Speaker A:These guys got solid hearts and minds.
Speaker A:They're a little quirky, but in a lovable way.
Speaker B:All right, guys, we are quirky.
Speaker C:We love you.
Speaker B:We love being quirky.
Speaker A:All right, I'm starting off the quirky twins.
Speaker A:I'm starting off with the fluff.
Speaker A:All right, here we go.
Speaker A:All right, so welcome, guys.
Speaker A:Hey, hey, hey.
Speaker A:Here we are.
Speaker B:Let me say hello.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker B:To all of you beautiful, exotic cocktails out there.
Speaker B:You could be quirky with the rev and I, too, if you want.
Speaker C:Welcome to the cork zone.
Speaker A:Welcome to the.
Speaker A:Welcome to the quirk zone.
Speaker A:All right, well, that's something new.
Speaker A:We'll have to put that in the show notes next time.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:All right, guys, here we are once again in the round.
Speaker A:Oh, wait.
Speaker A:Did I just knock this?
Speaker A:I think I did.
Speaker B:You did.
Speaker B:But we're on.
Speaker A:We're on.
Speaker B:Okay, Live here.
Speaker A:We're still live.
Speaker A:We haven't been knocked off.
Speaker A:All right, so tonight.
Speaker A:Oh, man, this is.
Speaker A:This topic.
Speaker A:It's been working on my heart, you know, and.
Speaker A:And again, with the world kind of the way it is, it's sort of highlighted maybe at least in my life.
Speaker A:And I think a lot of you out there are going to be able to at least benefit from a discussion that.
Speaker A:That at least calls it out a little bit.
Speaker A:And that's the word hate.
Speaker A:It's a strong emotion.
Speaker A:It's a word that.
Speaker A:That can get us really riled.
Speaker C:Our pre show is only two and a half hours long.
Speaker C:Wrestle with it.
Speaker A:Trying to deal, you know, deal it and frame it.
Speaker A:But I think it's going to be really helpful, not only for you out there, our listeners, gang, but us as well, because we can all benefit from a conversation like this.
Speaker A:And let's just keep one thing up front and center, and that's.
Speaker A:We want to try to have any conversation that we have in this podcast to get you to think differently about the normal stuff that you, you know, you go through every day, and you categorize it a certain way.
Speaker A:It's part of your worldview, and maybe there is a different way to frame it and a different way to look at it.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:And so hopefully this episode tonight, when we talk about hate hating, maybe we'll give you cause to step back.
Speaker A:Go.
Speaker A:I never thought about it.
Speaker C:You know, I always love Mac, that you pick topics with the intent that it's meaningful and that maybe it can bring a little bit of hope to the world.
Speaker C:I was.
Speaker C:Find your heart is very there, even if it's a difficult subject and not.
Speaker B:Not only meaningful.
Speaker B:Rev, but it impacts everybody.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker B:I mean, this.
Speaker B:Everybody either knows what hate is or has experienced it.
Speaker B:I'm sorry if you have.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:But everybody can relate to this topic.
Speaker B:And so it.
Speaker B:We think it's important.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker B:To address it so we can learn how to do it better.
Speaker B:But we first got to talk about it.
Speaker B:We got to talk about what it is first.
Speaker B:Right?
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:I mean, there's hard to solve a problem if you don't even know what the problem is.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker C:Or you don't even acknowledge that there is a problem.
Speaker A:That's.
Speaker C:A teacher is in the room.
Speaker C:Let's talk about it.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:So, you know, stick with us.
Speaker A:Stick with us in this episode.
Speaker A:We're gonna.
Speaker A:This is the one week I don't think I'm gonna say something like, let's have some fun with this gang.
Speaker A:I mean, it didn't quite feel right to say that about this topic.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:But it's all right.
Speaker A:We'll.
Speaker A:We'll.
Speaker B:We're with you.
Speaker A:We're gonna wade in.
Speaker A:All right, where's to the wise?
Speaker A:And we were talking about this in the pre show, so strap in.
Speaker A:Yeah, you gotta strap in a little bit here and, you know, just.
Speaker A:Just take it for what you.
Speaker A:You.
Speaker A:You want to grin it.
Speaker A:So here's the words to the Wise.
Speaker A:It's a quote by a French author.
Speaker A:Her name is Anais Nin.
Speaker A:And so here's what she said.
Speaker A:I hate.
Speaker A:Rarely, though, when I hate, I hate murderously.
Speaker B:Yikes.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:Some.
Speaker A:Some pretty strong words right there.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker C:The fuse is long.
Speaker C:Don't get to the end of it.
Speaker A:Right, Right.
Speaker A:That's a good way.
Speaker A:We didn't talk about that in the pre show.
Speaker A:There's a good way to look at it.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:I hate.
Speaker A:Rarely the one I hate, I hate murderously.
Speaker A:And again, that's an expression.
Speaker A:Doesn't mean she's going out and selling, killing people.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:I mean, you guys, I mean, it's, it's an expression.
Speaker B:Well, it's high.
Speaker B:I see that being like deep compassion for whatever it is and maybe all consuming, like.
Speaker B:Like she's out of control.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:That's kind of how I hear that.
Speaker A:Just.
Speaker B:I hope nobody ever gets it feels like that.
Speaker B:I really do, you know, although I.
Speaker C:With this topic, I, you know, in my past life, when I was not enlightened, hate was a regular part of the vocabulary and I had to actually murder parts of myself or release or kill parts of myself to get to the greater capacity for love and compassion that I enjoy today.
Speaker C:So, you know, I originally, originally had a reaction to murderously, but I thought maybe it's just talking about internal things that need to be squashed.
Speaker A:They need to go, need to be.
Speaker B:Released and moved on.
Speaker A:Yeah, well, again, it's, it's sort of.
Speaker A:I picked this one because it sort of sets the stage for, I don't know, the gravity of the situation, the gravity of the topic.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:I mean, you can go lots of different places and so there was an expression here in this quote that I just wanted to have a startup with.
Speaker B:Well, and what's, you know, we talk about spirituality and we talk about Jesus a lot.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:And this is in stark contrast to Jesus.
Speaker B:So it's good to, you know, put it out there so we can have a place to start.
Speaker A:Well, interreking, we're going to talk about, you know, some of these things that happen in our life and that we express and that also get expressed to us.
Speaker A:And so that's what this whole.
Speaker C:Well, and it takes a great deal of humility for somebody to say that, that I've got that energy going on in me.
Speaker C:It's an invitation for me to be that humble and vulnerable with myself.
Speaker A:Sure.
Speaker C:And my thoughts and the words I'm speaking and the actions I take.
Speaker A:No, yeah, it's definitely a vulnerability in it.
Speaker A:Well, I hadn't thought about it in that way, but that's a good point too.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:So here, you know, we're just going to.
Speaker A:Again, we love to do this.
Speaker A:You've.
Speaker A:If you listen to us regularly, we.
Speaker A:This is our mode of operandi and we're just, you know, we fire hose you.
Speaker A:We're going to give you A bunch of little nuggets.
Speaker A:We're going to, we're going to talk about hate.
Speaker A:How does it manifest?
Speaker A:What's it look like?
Speaker A:And we may come up with some things that you hadn't looked at that way.
Speaker A:That's one of those things differently.
Speaker A:We hope that happens.
Speaker A:And at the same time, it's probably some common stuff as well that you're going to nod your head and go, well, yeah, I may have done that in the past or I might have experienced that in the past.
Speaker A:So it's all the above.
Speaker B:So let me, let me just say, Mac and Rev, I just want to encourage everybody to stick around.
Speaker B:Yeah, right.
Speaker B:I mean, this isn't going to be comfortable.
Speaker B:It's not meant to be.
Speaker B:But we're here with you, walking it with you.
Speaker B:Right?
Speaker B:So.
Speaker A:Exactly.
Speaker B:So let's, let's get, you know, get through it.
Speaker B:And I think life will be better on the other side.
Speaker A:Amen.
Speaker A:Yep, Amen.
Speaker C:Amen.
Speaker A:And I'll preach.
Speaker B:All right, all right.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:So here we go.
Speaker A:Let's just kind of deal.
Speaker A:Let's just sort of jump in the deep end here.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker A:Hate.
Speaker A:A lot of times you can speak about hate when it comes to your.
Speaker A:Ourselves as our shadow.
Speaker A:You know, it's that real true self sometimes that we're down deep in there and it can start first and foremost with just hating ourself, you know, that, that we may not express it that way, but you know, we're.
Speaker A:We're down big time on our own self, let alone trying to hate somebody else.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And that's, that's.
Speaker A:I don't know if I'm going to call it common, but don't, you know, maybe you don't call it hate, but at the same time it's that self deprecation, that deprecation.
Speaker A:What am I.
Speaker A:I use the wrong word still Deprecation.
Speaker C:That's it.
Speaker A:Is that it?
Speaker A:I got it.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker C:You know, I think we're all walking around with wounds.
Speaker C:Whether we're conscious of them or not, or whether we have worked with them and spent time with them and, and workshop them, if you will, or not.
Speaker C:Those wounds exist.
Speaker C:It's part of the human journey.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker C:And a wound that is not been dealt with, not been looked at, just buried can manifest absolutely as a shadow that can absolutely hate.
Speaker C:Not even know why I'm hating.
Speaker A:Yeah, well, it's.
Speaker A:The one thing about this discussion, or any discussion you want to have about this topic is there's way more nuances than knowns.
Speaker A:All right, I Mean, you know, we're going to go and we're going to talk through it the best that we can, but there's also a whole lot more stuff going on, you know, because we're pretty comparable.
Speaker A:We're cocktails.
Speaker A:And so it, it's not quite as simple as just listening, but I think.
Speaker B:Everybody can, can relate to this.
Speaker B:Everybody has hated something about themselves.
Speaker B:And I got, I got to just explain, like you guys know, and we talked in the pre show, like I don't even use the word hate, so how many times I'm going to have to say it in this episode really bothers me.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker C:You could.
Speaker B:I strongly dislike me.
Speaker A:Yeah, well, that's, that's, it's going to be some good, you know, follow up stuff.
Speaker A:You're going to have some great stuff to share there too, so.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:But another thing about hate, you know, regardless of whether it's in yourself or you look at it out there, or you direct it to something out there, whether it's a person or whatever else, a circumstance, I tended to think about hate.
Speaker A:And it's seductive.
Speaker A:You know, it can be very nuanced, it can be shadowed, it can be hidden.
Speaker A:We don't even call it that.
Speaker A:And yet it is that versus, I mean, we pretty much recognize it when it's blatant.
Speaker A:I mean, when it's right up there in your face.
Speaker B:Oh, for sure you see it.
Speaker B:And the seductive part, this is this type of hatred is the most dangerous.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker C:Wearing a mask.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:It's not easily recognized because you, you feel justified right.
Speaker B:In it.
Speaker B:Like, like listen to this.
Speaker B:Like, hey, I don't hate them.
Speaker B:I just think they're ruining everything.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:Like that's something you might say.
Speaker B:Hey, it's not hate.
Speaker B:It's just moral clarity.
Speaker C:Right.
Speaker B:I mean this is where it could, it could disguise itself.
Speaker B:You know, and so it's really, you know, you see this a lot in, in our world and you know, even in humor and sarcasm.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:Sometimes this is a weapon.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker C:It's that, that hate is absolutely hidden and it looks like piety sometimes.
Speaker C:You know, it looks like a greater than, less than a judgment that I'm on my high and mighty moral war horse and I'm subtly tearing people down around me.
Speaker C:But look at me, I'm a good person.
Speaker B:Well, and here's another thing that's dangerous about this.
Speaker B:And Jesus talked about this in the Bible.
Speaker B:Is it, it camouflages itself as the truth.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:So you may not even realize that you're doing it, that you have this hatred.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:Because you may think it's the truth.
Speaker A:Yeah, well, yes.
Speaker A:And I actually makes me think of a meme that I did a while back then.
Speaker A:I said, be careful how tightly you hold your truths in this.
Speaker A:In this case, I was talking about truth.
Speaker A:It's a short little jump from white knuckles to bloody ones.
Speaker B:Yep.
Speaker A:So we all have to be conscious of how close we are to that.
Speaker A:The Rev was talking about this in the pre show, and we'll flesh it out a little bit more.
Speaker A:The edge.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:We all have those edges, and it's different for each one of us.
Speaker A:And we'll.
Speaker A:We'll talk about.
Speaker C:That's when we have to ask the question.
Speaker C:When we're on the edge.
Speaker C:The knuckles are feeling night white, and my face is getting red.
Speaker C:What is going on inside of me?
Speaker C:Not what's going on outside of me.
Speaker C:Something's happening.
Speaker C:It's a trigger.
Speaker C:If I'm so angry about something that you guys did, I've got some healing to do on the inside.
Speaker C:The wound is showing itself.
Speaker C:I can either suppress it, or I can deal with it.
Speaker C:As I say, hug the monster, love the dragon.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Well, you know, we're talking about both sides of the coin here, too.
Speaker A:There's the inside, and then it also can be applied as it comes to us.
Speaker A:And that.
Speaker A:How can we understand other people better?
Speaker A:I mean, if we've done the internal work as we look in the mirror and we're starting to name this and we're starting to get, you know, at least not get a handle on it, but at least we're addressing it, then at the same time, we can more easily see it in others.
Speaker A:Not so that we can then beat him over the head with it.
Speaker A:So that we can also come alongside when we see these things and help each other in the whole deal as well.
Speaker A:Right, Right.
Speaker C:When I see people who have managed, you know, their emotions in control, I want.
Speaker C:I want more of that.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker C:How did you manage that?
Speaker C:Maybe it looks like a discernment.
Speaker C:This is what I like.
Speaker C:This is what I don't.
Speaker C:But it hasn't gotten out of control and gone unconscious where it becomes, I believe, hate.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Well, you know, where do these things come from?
Speaker C:Right.
Speaker A:In our life, where do these things come from socially?
Speaker A:Where do these things come from religiously?
Speaker A:I mean, it's all a mixed bag out there.
Speaker A:And so you can start with an idea, maybe, that you can ask the question, well, does God you hate?
Speaker A:You know, is God capable as an emotion of hating?
Speaker A:You know, is there A theological basis for some people.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker B:Some people believe this.
Speaker C:I was going to give the coach to answer.
Speaker C:Yes, no, no, this guy does not hate, cannot hate, knows nothing of hate.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:But at the same time, you know, we do.
Speaker A:We do see that word.
Speaker A:Especially if you're a Christian and you study the scriptures and you know, you're going to see that word in the Bible and now you really have to understand and go peel the onion back and do some context work.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:You know, because the minute you give God the ability in your mind, okay.
Speaker A:To hate something or someone, now all of a sudden, a lot of us will take that as permission to do the same.
Speaker A:Right, Right.
Speaker A:And we just got to be really careful.
Speaker A:And we talked about this for years.
Speaker A:So, you know, one of the little isms that has always bugged me.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:It's always just set me off the wrong way, is this statement that says, well, hate the sin, but love the sinner.
Speaker A:How many times has everybody out there.
Speaker B:I've heard that.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:And I've always, always said, that's impossible.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:For me, anyway.
Speaker A:I mean, I don't think you can put them both in the same sentence like that.
Speaker A:If I'm going to hate your sin, I'm already unleashed to hate.
Speaker A:All right?
Speaker A:Where does that take me?
Speaker A:And where does that go?
Speaker A:How much discernment I have?
Speaker A:Can I even control it?
Speaker B:What people don't realize is the sin you're talking about gets kind of tangled up in.
Speaker B:In the person's, like, identity.
Speaker A:Absolutely.
Speaker B:And their humanity.
Speaker B:So by.
Speaker B:By saying that you hate the sin, you're kind of saying you hate, you're hating them.
Speaker B:Right?
Speaker A:That's.
Speaker A:That's my point, you know?
Speaker A:Oh, no, I hate your sin, but I love you, brother.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:I mean, it's.
Speaker A:It's just.
Speaker C:Well, I'm going to take the opposite tactic just because I believe I can strongly dislike somebody's behavior, but never give up my capacity to look beneath the surface of their behavior, to see the soul that maybe is buried, the wound, wound that maybe is buried, and go, I'm going to love you anyway.
Speaker C:And I think Jesus did that.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker C:Jesus absolutely called people out on their behavior.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker C:But still love them in the midst.
Speaker B:So you're talking more about sin being like, a condition that needs to be healed.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:More than, like, a crime that has to be punished, which I think a lot of us think of it like that.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:You know?
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:But that's what you're talking about.
Speaker B:And I agree.
Speaker B:And I agree.
Speaker B:If something needs to be Healed on the inside when that happens.
Speaker C:So I'm always going to be, when it comes to crime, on the edge, on the side of rehabilitation, because something's been forgotten, something's been suppressed or squashed.
Speaker C:That something still exists there.
Speaker C:So I think I can absolutely really, you know, pay into Caesar what is Caesar's.
Speaker C:There's going to be consequences for your actions, and I will hold you accountable to those, but I will also pay unto God what is God's.
Speaker C:And that means to love no matter what.
Speaker B:So, Rev, how about this?
Speaker B:How about instead of saying hate the sin, but love the sinner, we say name the wound and love the wounded.
Speaker C:O, I like it.
Speaker A:Oh, that might be a meme.
Speaker A:I love that there's a stew is.
Speaker C:What does that take from you to do that?
Speaker C:That takes a great deal of compassion.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker C:And it takes humility.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker C:And risk.
Speaker C:You have to risk because you might get hurt in that.
Speaker B:I think that.
Speaker B:I think it's more accurate in that way because what you're talking about is somebody is wounded in some way.
Speaker A:Yeah, right.
Speaker C:You know, Jesus also said, love your enemy, and I carry it a step further.
Speaker C:With all due respect, you have no enemies.
Speaker C:You have no enemies, but you have wounded people around you that need your help.
Speaker C:You know, there's of course, in miracles says that everything is love or fear.
Speaker C:And you can boil it all down, and if you look for the wound, there's a fear there.
Speaker C:Hatred is based upon fear.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:Well, that's.
Speaker A:That gets again, gets back to naming it.
Speaker A:I mean, you know, you got to confront it.
Speaker A:You got to name it.
Speaker A:You got to, you know, you know, it's you.
Speaker A:What do we say?
Speaker A:You got you to realize you got a problem before you can even begin to solve it.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So the other thing about hate that is pretty common, and I think you're all out there going to nod in the.
Speaker A:In the same direction is it's way easier.
Speaker A:Easier?
Speaker A:I didn't say easy.
Speaker A:Easy.
Speaker A:Er, to quote hate or have disdain or however, you know, synonym.
Speaker A:You want to stick in there with it.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:When you can do it as part of.
Speaker A:Of the herd, when you have the common.
Speaker A:Yeah, you have that common worldview, that common energy.
Speaker A:And wherever it's directed and however it's handled, you get complacent.
Speaker A:You just.
Speaker A:You don't even really.
Speaker A:Again, you don't even really necessarily recognize it enough to call it hate because everybody else is doing it around you.
Speaker A:And so now you almost feel it seems okay.
Speaker B:Because everybody's.
Speaker B:Everybody's doing it right.
Speaker A:Age old thing, right?
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker C:So can hate manifest as comfortableness?
Speaker C:I'm just comfortable.
Speaker C:I'm going to go along with the crowd and the herd because that's comfortable, Right?
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker C:Well, that's, that's got to step out of the herd mentality to go, this person might be hurting.
Speaker C:There might be a wound here.
Speaker C:Why don't we explore with compassion and love what's going on on the inside as opposed to just making them the other.
Speaker B:All right, so here's your psa.
Speaker B:Here's your reminder.
Speaker B:You two know this because I say this all the time.
Speaker B:Time.
Speaker B:But we're telling everybody listening to us out there right now, everybody that you come across has a story.
Speaker B:Everyone.
Speaker B:So however they're interacting with you or whatever you see them doing, if you think that first you might have a whole different feeling about what's happening in that situation.
Speaker A:True.
Speaker A:Well, that's.
Speaker C:So is compassion the antidote to hate internally and externally?
Speaker A:I say passion.
Speaker C:It can for sure help me understand your story, brother.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker C:And maybe I'll change my opinion.
Speaker A:Well, and again, that's harder to do when you have the pressure of the norm.
Speaker A:I'm going to call it the norm.
Speaker A:Thinking you have to sort of, in order to do what you're talking about, guys, I see it as you're going to have to separate yourself a little bit from that hurt so that it doesn't influence you and kick you, you know, kick you right back in the minute you begin to stray a little bit from, you know, from again, the norm.
Speaker A:And again, it's not easy, that's for sure.
Speaker A:But again, it's.
Speaker A:It's subtle.
Speaker A:A lot of times you just don't even.
Speaker A:You don't even call it that.
Speaker A:You don't even name it that because there's way out.
Speaker A:You're justifying it in all sorts of other different ways.
Speaker A:And it doesn't seem like that anymore, you know, but you.
Speaker A:I think we talked about it and we were talking.
Speaker A:Stu was talking in the pre show.
Speaker A:Words matter, okay?
Speaker A:Words matter.
Speaker A:So when you use the word hate in the, you know, as it's defined, however that runs through everybody's grid.
Speaker A:They all have a different.
Speaker A:Every.
Speaker A:All of us have a different definition, if you will.
Speaker A:The way that we grid that word.
Speaker A:We have to be careful.
Speaker A:We aren't just casual with it.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:And it could be very, very subtle.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:I thought your story was a great one.
Speaker B:I mean, think about it.
Speaker B:People out there.
Speaker B:I mean, how many times do you say, oh, I hate this food.
Speaker B:It's terrible.
Speaker B:Or, you know, I hate those shoes.
Speaker B:They just don't look right on me.
Speaker B:I mean, you just, you say things that you don't even realize, but that word carries energy.
Speaker B:And I, I, I shared with you both a long time ago.
Speaker B:I decided I wanted to remove it from my vocabulary.
Speaker B:So I, I don't.
Speaker B:And, and this didn't happen overnight.
Speaker A:But wait, wait, let me ask you a question.
Speaker C:Why?
Speaker B:Because it carries an energy that I don't want to put out there.
Speaker B:Even if it's subconscious.
Speaker B:You know, it's typically not conscious when you say it.
Speaker B:Like, somebody may, may say out loud, you know, I hate that music.
Speaker B:And they may not mean anything by.
Speaker B:In their.
Speaker B:But they're putting that into their consciousness, into their drip.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:And it's, it's in there.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:So I didn't want any of that in, in my consciousness.
Speaker B:I didn't want any of that energy, and I didn't want other people to get that from me.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:So I spent a lot of time just figuring out other ways to say what I wanted to say.
Speaker B:And it actually made me really learn vocabulary better, but it had me get a little more creative.
Speaker B:And additionally, I also started to learn a little bit about myself.
Speaker B:Like, what do I really think?
Speaker B:Like, why.
Speaker B:I'm saying I hate this thing, but why?
Speaker B:Like, what's going on?
Speaker B:Like, it just got me to explore myself a little bit, a little bit more.
Speaker B:So I learned more about who I was.
Speaker B:So now I don't.
Speaker B:That's what I'm saying.
Speaker B:I mean, this episode is going to be the most I've used this word in a long time.
Speaker C:Talking about hate can become normalized for you individually.
Speaker C:You chose.
Speaker C:I don't, I don't want it to be normal.
Speaker C:I'm going to replace it.
Speaker C:But we're doing this culturally.
Speaker C:We're doing it as a collective.
Speaker C:Hate has just become a word we talk about like it's no big deal.
Speaker C:And there is energy.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker C:And the more we use it, the more we get comfortable with it, the more than we're comfortable with the actions that come from that energy.
Speaker A:Yeah, well, don't, don't take this lightly.
Speaker A:Don't go, oh, well, come on, that isn't that big a deal.
Speaker A:Or you add all of these little pieces up and it matters.
Speaker A:It matters.
Speaker A:And your.
Speaker A:That's right, the drip.
Speaker A:More in your life, more in the culture, more in the world.
Speaker A:It sets off that negative vibration, and you can't, I mean, we use this in the pre show, the, the concept that it's out of control.
Speaker A:When you get to hate and that level of, you know, emotion or, you know, conversation or expression gets to that point, you're out of control.
Speaker C:So I want to counteract the energy now.
Speaker C:Love.
Speaker C:Love, love, love.
Speaker A:Love.
Speaker C:Compassion.
Speaker C:Compassion and kindness.
Speaker B:Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
Speaker A:Use of the word.
Speaker A:Be careful with that.
Speaker A:And here's the thing, too, that I love to always do in the episode.
Speaker A:What are we talking about right now?
Speaker A:We're talking about the word hate specifically.
Speaker A:This is what we've just been focused on.
Speaker A:But broaden it.
Speaker A:I mean, go wherever you want to go with it and look at your vocabulary, look at the words that you use and maybe just name it.
Speaker C:Well, name it and then dig it down.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker C:Why has that word been normalized in my vocabulary?
Speaker C:Why do I use it so much?
Speaker C:Let me just pay attention and dig beneath the surface of where it's coming from.
Speaker A:And that's.
Speaker A:Is it really?
Speaker A:What do you think?
Speaker A:Yeah, right.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Oh, no, I think you're right.
Speaker C:Oh.
Speaker C:Hate isn't really what I'm feeling.
Speaker C:It's just been normalized.
Speaker C:There's something else.
Speaker C:It probably is fear.
Speaker C:I'm afraid of something.
Speaker A:Yes, yes, that.
Speaker A:Well, that's a really truth.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:Because hate probably isn't really the right word.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:But it matters that you're using it.
Speaker A:I guess what we're trying to get at.
Speaker A:So heads up on that one.
Speaker C:You know, what I like to say is that if there is somebody who is hating, you can trace it back.
Speaker C:That they love something underneath that you file that they love something and they're willing to fight or defend it or murder for it, whatever it is.
Speaker C:If you can get to the love, the hate will disappear.
Speaker C:What you have in your notes, I think is really the dangerous place is indifference.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:Well, a lot of times we think.
Speaker A:And it's true.
Speaker A:I'm not saying this is false, that the natural opposite to hate is love.
Speaker A:And I'm certainly not by any means going to say that's not true.
Speaker A:But again, let's think a little differently.
Speaker A:Just think a little differently here.
Speaker A:Even love and hate, they both are strong emotions.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:They both carry with them a great deal of emotion.
Speaker A:Almost the antithesis of hate can be looked at as indifference.
Speaker A:Like the rep just said that now we're absent of emotion.
Speaker C:Is indifference the antithesis of love as well?
Speaker A:Yeah, that's right.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Well, that could be.
Speaker A:Yes, I think you might.
Speaker A:That's a good point.
Speaker C:I just don't care, period.
Speaker C:You know, somebody who's hating something cares about Something, somebody who's loving something, cares about something, right?
Speaker C:Peel it back to the care, get to the care, the wound, whatever it is, Dig beneath the surface.
Speaker C:But if they're indifferent, if you're indifferent, that's a dangerous place.
Speaker A:That's an insightful thing right there.
Speaker A:Yeah, I like that, Ralph.
Speaker A:Well, there we are.
Speaker A:So at the end of the day, even, even though we're in a collective maybe, and we're, we're expressing these kinds of emotions and these kinds of actions at the core of it, a lot of times, as we peel it back, the Rebbe likes to say, a lot of times the core of this stuff is that we separate ourselves from each other.
Speaker A:So now all of a sudden I'm indifferent to you because I don't really know you.
Speaker A:I don't understand you.
Speaker A:I haven't had enough, you know, conversation.
Speaker A:I haven't been able to, you know, express any compassion or love or whatever it might be.
Speaker A:And so again, that hate filled attitude and emotion when, when we're separate, the dualism that creeps in all over the place, it's easier to do.
Speaker A:It's just easier to, you know, to, to just normalize you just get you out of.
Speaker A:I don't even have to pay attention.
Speaker A:I don't really even care or I don't even know.
Speaker A:So again, we always talk in this podcast about relationships and about everything that happens, boils down to a relation, has a relational component.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:No matter what we're talking about.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:So interesting stuff at how it will affect, you know, relationships and how the energy goes out between people.
Speaker A:So really good, good stuff there.
Speaker A:So that's just some of our nuggets for hate, how you look at it and how it might manifest itself in our lives.
Speaker A:I think we're going to take the second half of the episode and now we're going to talk and then we'll talk about.
Speaker A:Well, all right, I got it.
Speaker A:Yeah, makes sense.
Speaker A:And let's, let's put some things into practice.
Speaker A:Let's give you some, you know, wheels.
Speaker C:Tools for Transformation.
Speaker B:Oh, I like that.
Speaker A:That might we have a new heading.
Speaker A:We'll put a new heading in our agenda.
Speaker A:Call it Tools for Transformation Revs.
Speaker B:Tools for Transformation.
Speaker A:I like that.
Speaker A:Okay, so anyway, we're going to come back and we'll dive into some of the how to's.
Speaker A:So hang on.
Speaker A:And we'll be right back.
Speaker B:I'll be interested.
Speaker B:It's going to be interesting to hear how this sounds because to me it sounds really funky in my headphones.
Speaker B:But, but I'm trusting you're hearing it's going to be okay.
Speaker A:No, we're.
Speaker A:I think we're going to be okay.
Speaker C:It sounds okay.
Speaker B:Sounds good.
Speaker B:Okay, good.
Speaker B:Yeah, it may just be.
Speaker C:May just be me again.
Speaker A:The good thing is there's lots of.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:AI Stuff now that in the post.
Speaker B:Takes care of it.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:That helps at least minimize a lot of that kind of stuff.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker B:All right, man, you blew right out of seductive and blatant and denial.
Speaker B:I was ready to talk about blatant and denial, and I was like, ready to go.
Speaker A:Well, you know what?
Speaker A:You can weave some of that.
Speaker B:Okay, we don't.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker C:If you've got notes, bring them in.
Speaker B:Yeah, well, no, if it's.
Speaker B:If it's relevant, I mean, I'm not gonna force it.
Speaker A:No.
Speaker A:Yeah, well, I agree.
Speaker A:Don't force it.
Speaker A:But I think there's certainly points here as we direct.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:Whatever that negativeness is.
Speaker A:Is, again, those are, you know, being aware.
Speaker A:I mean, awareness is a huge part of all of this topic.
Speaker A:To just even be a.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:I didn't realize that was hateful.
Speaker A:Your heart really knew it.
Speaker A:But, you know, you're not.
Speaker A:You're not, you know, acknowledging it in your brain.
Speaker A:All right, here we go.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:Welcome back to the Wise Guys, where in this episode, we are talking about hate.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Oh, yeah.
Speaker A:That gives us good heebie jeebies.
Speaker B:Does give me the shivers.
Speaker C:I hate talking about.
Speaker A:I hate talking.
Speaker A:Yeah, there it is.
Speaker B:I hate this topic.
Speaker C:Well, there it is.
Speaker A:See, now we got to peel that onion back a little bit.
Speaker A:All right, It's.
Speaker A:It's important we see it happening more and more in the world today.
Speaker A:As the world gets more and more complicated and it gets more and more impersonal.
Speaker A:Those couple of things certainly add to.
Speaker A:I'm not going to say our ability, but just the ease at which maybe the hate gets propagated.
Speaker C:Well, I think at the end of the first segment of this episode, you talk about it separation.
Speaker C:We have gotten to a consciousness that we are so separate from each other, we are indifferent about each other.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker C:And I think that's causing more hate on the planet.
Speaker A:Yeah, it's easier to go there, isn't it?
Speaker B:And I'm going to suggest that's because we can know each other better.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:Like we talked in the first part of this about, everybody has a story.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:I think if we knew each other better, that we wouldn't be feel that separation.
Speaker A:Well, absolutely.
Speaker C:You know, what came first?
Speaker C:The separation or the hate?
Speaker C:Or is it a Causal relationship.
Speaker C:And this story is the pattern Interrupt.
Speaker C:If I hear your story, it stops all of the pattern.
Speaker C:But I don't know which one came first, my hate or the separation.
Speaker C:The separation or the hate?
Speaker C:The story is the remedy.
Speaker A:Well, that.
Speaker A:That's exactly right.
Speaker A:And it's easier.
Speaker A:See, we all operate in all different ways, not just with this topic yet.
Speaker A:When we get to a default and we get in a maintenance mode, we just maintain and we talk about this as we describe the podcast of shattering the norm.
Speaker A:It is way easy, easy, much, much easier to maintain the status quo than to do the work like you guys are talking about, right?
Speaker A:To say, hey, wait a minute here, like Stu was talking about.
Speaker A:I am going to do the work and I am going to eliminate the word hate from my vocabulary.
Speaker A:That's my mission.
Speaker A:I'm committed to that and I'm going to do it.
Speaker A:It's work.
Speaker A:It just doesn't happen.
Speaker A:But there's going to need to be, you know, receiving.
Speaker A:You're going to have to make a commitment out there to say, well, whatever, whatever I need to do.
Speaker A:I need to start somewhere and I'm going to have to start to make some stuff happen.
Speaker A:How about just let's take pick up on, let's pick up on Stu's idea of not hate, but just guard your tongue.
Speaker A:The Bible talks all about, you know, speech and words and your tongue, the tongue.
Speaker A:But again, I'm going to go back to words matter.
Speaker A:So begin to just analyze and be aware of the words that you use.
Speaker C:Self inventory is the greatest spiritual path.
Speaker C:What is coming out of my mouth?
Speaker C:Do I like it?
Speaker C:Does it feel good in my body?
Speaker C:Do I like the effects of it?
Speaker C:Stop doing it, then try something different.
Speaker C:I imagine you're taking that out of your vocabulary.
Speaker C:Was just one tool of many of your self inventory.
Speaker B:Yeah, yeah, for sure.
Speaker A:Well, and in this one thing that you can use to help you do this particular tool, use this tool better, is to take somebody that's close to you that you can trust, that you have a good relationship with and say, look, do me a favor.
Speaker A:If I use the word hate, call me out on it.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:Ask me to say it in another way.
Speaker A:Yeah, there you go.
Speaker B:You have to learn how to do that.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:Because you still have something to say.
Speaker B:You just gotta say it using different words.
Speaker A:Good, excellent.
Speaker A:I like, like that.
Speaker A:And again, pick another word.
Speaker A:It doesn't matter.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:But you know, get somebody to help you as well, because it's hard for us to see our own blind spots and Here, most of the time.
Speaker B:Here's the thing to consider and to notice.
Speaker B:You may not even know how to rephrase it because you may not understand why you're really saying it.
Speaker A:True.
Speaker B:So then you have to do some self exploration and figure it out.
Speaker B:And that's good to work.
Speaker A:That's more work.
Speaker B:Practice.
Speaker B:What did I.
Speaker B:What did I say in the pre show?
Speaker B:You got to practice, practice, practice.
Speaker C:Well, it's back to the humility.
Speaker C:I'm going to invite friends into my life to hold me accountable to my language.
Speaker C:And I'll be, I'm sure surprised at how many times I'm using that word or that idea is crossing my brain.
Speaker C:It's like, I have no idea.
Speaker C:You got to trust the people you're hanging out with.
Speaker B:Right, Right.
Speaker C:To.
Speaker C:To lovingly call you to account.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And give them permission.
Speaker A:Yeah, that's the one.
Speaker C:And it works better if you do it as a team.
Speaker C:I'm going to call you out on yours.
Speaker A:Correct.
Speaker A:Correct.
Speaker A:So just think about that a little bit.
Speaker A:You got your little tribe of five we talk about, oh, maybe it's your tribe of one.
Speaker A:It doesn't matter.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker B:It's your tribe.
Speaker A:Get some help.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:The other thing, you know, when you get momentum.
Speaker A:Let's talk about the physics of momentum.
Speaker A:When something starts in a particular direction, you know, it's only going to stop when there's an equal, an opposite force coming in the opposite direction.
Speaker A:So when you begin to address things like this hate, what am I going to do about this?
Speaker A:You can move the.
Speaker A:Move the conversation, move the words, move the energy, move the thought away from hate.
Speaker A:Hate, hate, hate, hate, hate.
Speaker A:How am I going to get over it?
Speaker A:How am I going to get over it?
Speaker A:Now begin to reframe it.
Speaker A:Reframe it.
Speaker A:More in it.
Speaker A:I think as Stu's been talking about.
Speaker A:Perfect example of this is use different words.
Speaker A:You know what, what am I really trying to say here or express here?
Speaker A:Let's use a different word.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:And I don't mean a different word from hate, you know, to Kumbaya because those are, you know, you're not trying to express the same thought there.
Speaker A:Don't try to do more than it's intended to do.
Speaker A:I guess what I'm getting at there.
Speaker A:But pick a different word that lowers, you know, it just.
Speaker A:Well, I shouldn't say lowers.
Speaker A:It raises the vibration.
Speaker B:Like earlier we said something you might say and not even think think about is I hate this music.
Speaker B:Right?
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:So maybe it's like, you know what this Music isn't making my feet dance or this music.
Speaker B:I'm not.
Speaker B:I'm not feeling happy when I hear this music.
Speaker B:It's something.
Speaker B:I mean, it's going to be something.
Speaker B:Something.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker C:Right.
Speaker B:Whatever it is.
Speaker C:Well, the empowered place is I choose to not listen to this music.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker C:Period.
Speaker C:But I think what you're asking is tears of.
Speaker C:Of peeling back again, the banana of the hate.
Speaker C:And I wrote words like, okay, I'm feeling angry.
Speaker B:There's a.
Speaker C:That's.
Speaker C:That's progress.
Speaker C:I'm gone from hate to I'm feeling angry or I'm feeling hurt.
Speaker C:And then explore.
Speaker C:There's the self inventory.
Speaker C:How did I get to hurt?
Speaker C:Probably there's going to be fear at some level.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:And you be kind to yourself in this whole process.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker C:It's not about judging yourself.
Speaker C:It's important.
Speaker C:This is an energy I'm holding in my.
Speaker C:In my field.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker C:So I want it or not.
Speaker B:And it doesn't.
Speaker B:It doesn't happen overnight.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:And it may occur in steps.
Speaker B:Like you may be in.
Speaker B:In this and.
Speaker B:And you don't notice it until after.
Speaker A:Correct.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:So that's a step.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker B:It happened.
Speaker B:I didn't catch it, but I did after.
Speaker B:And then the next time it'll be like, oh, I'm catching it.
Speaker B:Oh, but I'm still saying it.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:And then the next time, like, I caught it and now I'm not saying anything.
Speaker B:So it's going to be steps until you get to, okay, here's what I really think, and here's what I'm going to say.
Speaker C:It's a lifetime course.
Speaker B:So it's.
Speaker B:It's practice.
Speaker B:You got to practice it.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Well, I mean, what you're really saying is minimize.
Speaker A:It goes from this level, you know, I'm speaking at every fifth word.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Whatever it.
Speaker C:To.
Speaker A:Oh, now it's every fourth word, you know, now it's every sixth word.
Speaker A:Now it's every eighth.
Speaker A:And then you might drop that.
Speaker A:But the point being is you typically aren't going to go from, like you said, you know, use it a lot to not use it at all.
Speaker A:It just.
Speaker A:It's a process.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:And be happy and be comfortable and be gracious that you are minimizing it.
Speaker B:Along the way because you're learning about yourself.
Speaker A:You're.
Speaker B:You're developing a higher consciousness and doing this.
Speaker B:We talked about that last week.
Speaker B:Right, Right.
Speaker B:The consciousness.
Speaker B:So you're developing a higher consciousness by doing this.
Speaker A:Correct.
Speaker B:And you're understanding yourself better.
Speaker B:Which.
Speaker B:Is this going to Help you live a better life, and it's going to make life better for people around you.
Speaker A:Hello.
Speaker A:Hello.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:I think that's kind of the way it's supposed to work, doesn't it?
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:At the same time, you also, when you recognize this stuff in yourself or in other people as it comes at you, one of the first steps that you can take in learning how to put wheels on this is detach from it.
Speaker A:Don't give it the significance, you know, in the beginning, just let it set.
Speaker A:Whether it's in yourself or whether it's coming again from outside.
Speaker A:Detach from the emotion.
Speaker A:Detachment.
Speaker A:And you can look at it, you can view it, you can mull it over, you can come up with a plan for it once you're no longer.
Speaker C:I like to use the term I become a dispassionate witness.
Speaker C:I'm witnessing my life, I'm witnessing my reactions.
Speaker C:I'm becoming a conscious observer to my behavior.
Speaker C:And that means stepping aside into my spirit, looking at my humanness with compassionate eyes.
Speaker C:Where is the root of this?
Speaker B:Where.
Speaker C:Where's this coming from?
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker C:It's not easy to do again.
Speaker C:It's practice.
Speaker B:That's what I was going to say.
Speaker C:I did it for two seconds and I'm back in it.
Speaker C:Okay.
Speaker C:Tomorrow I'll do it.
Speaker C:Four seconds.
Speaker B:I was just going to say, guys, this is not easy to do.
Speaker B:I mean, it will make a huge difference.
Speaker B:I'm not saying don't do it.
Speaker B:I'm just saying it's not easy.
Speaker B:I don't want anybody out there to think, oh, this is like, we talk about it so casually.
Speaker B:You're going to fail because this is how we've been living our lives, right?
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker B:And I failed plenty of times to be able to do what you're talking about and affected a lot of people, you know, in my life.
Speaker C:And if you're on a growing path, you're going to fail again.
Speaker C:Okay.
Speaker C:I feel like I'm not using that word anymore or I'm not in that energy anymore until on my growth path, my spiritual path, suddenly somebody shows up.
Speaker C:Oh, I'm right there again.
Speaker C:Okay.
Speaker C:I'm still growing.
Speaker B:So you know what the coach says?
Speaker B:We don't fail.
Speaker B:We don't lose.
Speaker B:We just learn.
Speaker B:So that's what we're doing is hate.
Speaker C:A teacher is anger, judgment.
Speaker C:Are these just every teacher?
Speaker B:I think everything is, but yes.
Speaker B:So yes, to me.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:And then there are.
Speaker A:There's perfect example of how you need to reframe it all.
Speaker A:You need to reframe a negative, a murderous right word that gets used in front of you and say, okay, let's turn that a little bit.
Speaker A:Let's turn that and still deal with it.
Speaker A:We're not going to just, again, ignore it, but we're going to reframe it differently.
Speaker C:And in order to reframe it, you've got to become that, that dispassionate witness.
Speaker C:You've got to step back and go, okay, what's going on?
Speaker A:I like that.
Speaker A:Dispassionate witness.
Speaker A:I like that.
Speaker B:The best way to do that.
Speaker B:By the way people out there, if you're like, how do I do this?
Speaker B:Take a deep breath.
Speaker B:If you're still not there, take another deep breath.
Speaker B:God, this works.
Speaker B:I'm telling you.
Speaker C:This work reminds your body it's not gonna die.
Speaker C:Remind your mind you're safe, remind your mind your heart you're okay, right?
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:It's that same old adage, you can apply just about anything.
Speaker A:Just keep breathing.
Speaker A:Would you just keep breathing, please?
Speaker B:Just keep swimming.
Speaker C:Just keep swimming.
Speaker A:And in all of this, as we start to wrap this up a little bit and bring it to a close, as it's a death and resurrection process, to use a more biblical example, if you will, that you, me, all of us, I'm not pointing the finger out at you.
Speaker A:The collective us, we will die to these bad patterns, these old patterns, these destructive patterns, these destructive ways that we think and look at things.
Speaker A:And when those things die, we go a lot of times into this place called liminal space.
Speaker A:We've talked about that in history a lot of times.
Speaker A:This middle ground where we aren't going where we want to go, but we came out of where we were.
Speaker A:And then that middle ground, sometimes that is one of the scariest places in the world.
Speaker A:You know, we want to ground ourselves somewhere.
Speaker A:We want to just be, you know, to where we're comfortable and we're.
Speaker A:And yet you need that time.
Speaker A:You need that transition time, right?
Speaker B:You know, so.
Speaker B:So let me share something with you guys.
Speaker B:So just like, I didn't want to have the word hate in my vocabulary, though I understand what this means, you know, death and resurrection.
Speaker B:I get that death seems pretty harsh, so.
Speaker B:And I get that things, you know, you're looking at, like, things die in, off, and then I.
Speaker B:I get resurrected into something bigger and better, right?
Speaker B:So for any of you out there, that feel the way I do about this, because that doesn't feel good to me, this is what I do.
Speaker B:And I learned this.
Speaker B:I would love to say I made this up, but I didn't.
Speaker B:I learned this in one of my thousand seminars I went to.
Speaker B:It's like I first thank it.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker B:Show gratitude.
Speaker B:Thank you.
Speaker B:You've been here for a reason.
Speaker B:For me, this is the learning.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:I no longer need you.
Speaker B:So I'm pushing you to the side to open up for something new.
Speaker B:The resurrection.
Speaker C:I love that.
Speaker C:I like to add to that.
Speaker C:Thanking.
Speaker C:I bless you.
Speaker C:I bless you on your way.
Speaker C:That's the next level of, you're not my enemy.
Speaker C:I'm not against you.
Speaker C:You've served me well.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker C:And gave me what I needed.
Speaker C:Now I'm releasing you with blessing.
Speaker A:Well, that's a whole nother.
Speaker A:We can have a whole nother episode on that whole thing right there.
Speaker A:Boy, that's a.
Speaker A:That's a good one.
Speaker A:But I love it, guys.
Speaker A:I mean, I love that stew.
Speaker A:And you pick right up.
Speaker A:I don't just put.
Speaker C:And again, that's not going to be overnight.
Speaker C:I'm gonna kill the sucker first.
Speaker C:Okay.
Speaker C:Tomorrow I'll be a little more enlightened.
Speaker A:Too bad for him, though.
Speaker B:Yeah, I'll do it tomorrow.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:So, good stuff, guys.
Speaker A:Really good stuff.
Speaker A:So, wow, succinct little short takeaways note, because we're going to say to you, we're going to challenge you.
Speaker A:So your ongoing mission, should you choose to accept it, is love your enemies, love your, choose kindness.
Speaker B:I'm going to say to strive to do things the Jesus way, which is not to hate at all, but to heal what is broken, forgive what is wrong, and love the whole person into wholeness.
Speaker C:Man, that's a mouthful.
Speaker A:Well, I'm just gonna.
Speaker A:I don't need to say anything after that.
Speaker A:Thanks to.
Speaker C:Drop the mic.
Speaker A:Yeah, that's a mic drop moment right there.
Speaker C:How about we just go with what we said?
Speaker C:I'm gonna choose to breathe.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:Choose to breathe.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:I think for me, your mission is to take whatever it is we've talked about in this whole episode and at the minimum, pick one thing to change your thinking over and then put some wheels on it.
Speaker A:That's what we're going to challenge.
Speaker B:And just know we.
Speaker B:We are here with you.
Speaker B:We think about you often, listeners.
Speaker B:We are here with you energetically, you know, thinking about you and.
Speaker B:And you're not alone.
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker B:You are not alone.
Speaker C:Our prayer before this episode, every episode, is, may we make a difference to just one person.
Speaker C:May one person's life be a little bit better as a result of this playground.
Speaker A:Amen Great way to end.
Speaker A:Love it, guys.
Speaker A:Thank you.
Speaker A:My wise guys.
Speaker C:There's the wisdom, my captain.
Speaker A:What a bunch of wisdom.
Speaker A:So great.
Speaker A:Thank you for listening.
Speaker A:We certainly appreciate that.
Speaker A:Go share us with your friends.
Speaker A:Hopefully share it with with us whatever it is you might have gotten out of this or what you're going to do is a follow up to it and we'll be back next week with.
Speaker B:An another unthinkable conversation.
Speaker A:There it is.
Speaker A:Have a great week.
Speaker A:We'll see you on the flip side.
