Seeker Sensitivity: What Are We Really Looking For?
What are we really seeking in life? This episode dives into the concept of being seeker-sensitive, exploring how modern churches have taken an age-old idea and made it their mantra. We’ll chat about what it means to be a seeker in today’s world—hint: it’s all about looking for something deeper, whether it’s purpose, connection, or even a good cup of coffee. We'll share some laughs, sprinkle in some wisdom, and encourage you to think about how we can all create a welcoming space for those on their own journeys. So, grab your favorite drink, kick back, and let’s figure this seeker thing out together!
Takeaways:
- In this episode, we dive into the seeker-sensitive movement, exploring its roots and relevance today.
- Being a seeker means being open to experiencing life beyond your current understanding and comfort zone.
- We discuss the importance of emotional intelligence in engaging with seekers and fostering meaningful connections.
- The conversation emphasizes that community plays a crucial role in seeking and understanding one's purpose.
- Open-ended questions are essential for deepening conversations and encouraging others to share their journeys.
- We highlight the necessity of creating safe spaces for seekers to explore their faith without fear of judgment.
Transcript
Red button.
Speaker A:And then are we recording?
Speaker B:Well, we're live here.
Speaker B:That's what I want to make sure.
Speaker A:Yes, the red button is on.
Speaker A:The red light is on.
Speaker A:Okay, so we are recording.
Speaker A:Yes, I see the thing going up there.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:Excellent.
Speaker A:Here we are.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:Welcome to the Wise Guys, a podcast where we unleash the unthinkable, see things differently, and shatter the norms to help you expand your worldview.
Speaker A:But be careful, as we say every week, Right?
Speaker A:Be careful.
Speaker A:Be careful what you pray for.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:We always say that.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:It just might change everything.
Speaker A:It has the potential, doesn't it, guys?
Speaker A:Huh?
Speaker A:With my wise guys, of course.
Speaker A:I've got them here.
Speaker A:So we got the Rev in the house.
Speaker C:It's so good to be around your wisdom, Mac.
Speaker A:Well, that's questionable, but okay, I'll take it, man.
Speaker B:And the student coach, Stu, man, I'd agree with that.
Speaker B:Being around both of your wisdom, I.
Speaker A:Think the collective here is just amazing.
Speaker C:I'm just praying every time we get together that my wisdom quotient goes up a little bit because I'm spending time with the two of you.
Speaker A:There it is.
Speaker A:You guys, listen to this.
Speaker A:He's, you know, he's doing an infomercial for us.
Speaker A:Okay, this is great.
Speaker A:But no, we.
Speaker A:We totally respect each other for who we are, and it's.
Speaker A:It.
Speaker A:That's.
Speaker A:It just works great.
Speaker A:So I appreciate you guys being here.
Speaker A:Welcome to the Guys.
Speaker B:And, hey, before we get started, let me say hello to all of you beautif exotic cocktails out there.
Speaker B:I had some really exoticness.
Speaker B:Is that a.
Speaker B:Is that a proper phrase?
Speaker B:No, it's this weekend at the.
Speaker B:At the kids State wrestling tournament, and I actually got to talk about a little bit of wise guyness on the.
Speaker B:On the wrestling floor.
Speaker B:So imagine that, right?
Speaker B:There's wrestling going on, 14 mats all around, and I'm getting in conversations with.
Speaker A:People I think you have to tell.
Speaker C:Yeah, they're listening.
Speaker B:The good one.
Speaker C:I'm becoming famous in the wrestling world.
Speaker B:Tell them the good walking.
Speaker B:I'm walking through, and I hear somebody say the word sniggle it.
Speaker B:And I turned around, and this coach was just laughing.
Speaker B:He looked at me, and I'm like, oh, man, the Rev is famous in the wrestling world.
Speaker C:Or maybe infamous.
Speaker A:So here's the deal.
Speaker A:If you don't know what we're talking about, okay, go back and listen to the episode we did on wrestling, right?
Speaker A:We had a.
Speaker B:It was spiritual.
Speaker A:Spiritual wrestling.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:Okay, so go back there.
Speaker A:You'll understand what we're talking about.
Speaker A:It Was great one.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:And the rev was.
Speaker A:He.
Speaker A:He.
Speaker B:I actually wore my sniglet or my singlet that day.
Speaker B:Yeah, I wore the singlet.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Oh, gosh.
Speaker A:We're going off on this.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:So forgive us, but go.
Speaker B:Listen, what are we talking about this week, though?
Speaker B:Let's.
Speaker B:Let's hear it.
Speaker A:Well, we got to do Words to the wise.
Speaker B:Words to the wise.
Speaker A:Wor to the wise.
Speaker A:Here it is.
Speaker A:We are given dreams a size too big so that we can grow into them.
Speaker A:I love that when I read it, you know, and whether you believe that God isn't, you know, bestows that or puts those opportunities in front of you, or it's just the universe or just the way life works, you know, I just thought it was beautiful that the challenge is a little bit bigger.
Speaker C:I've always said that if your dream and your vision doesn't make your knees knock just a little bit, it's too small.
Speaker C:You're not thinking big enough.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker C:If you don't have to rely on something besides your limited understanding, then you're not big enough.
Speaker C:So let your knees knock.
Speaker B:Real dreams to me, feel overwhelming, and they often feel, like beyond my current capabilities.
Speaker C:Good.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker C:Right.
Speaker B:Which they should.
Speaker B:But, you know, if we rise to the occasion and, you know, we can grow into the person capable of achieving whatever the dream is.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:That's the goal.
Speaker C:And we learn to access things we didn't know were there.
Speaker A:And then what's next?
Speaker B:What's that?
Speaker A:Another iteration?
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker B:You know, the dreams get bigger and bigger and bigger.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:I think I did a meme one time that said, dare to scare yourself with a new thought, and if you wet your pants, you know, you're on the right track, so.
Speaker B:Oh, so that's what that was.
Speaker C:All right, I'm a little nervous now about the new thoughts tonight.
Speaker C:I might need a towel.
Speaker A:What are we talking about tonight?
Speaker A:What are we talking about?
Speaker B:Yes, that was the question.
Speaker C:That was a question four minutes ago.
Speaker A:I'm going back.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:I'm going back to the question.
Speaker A:We are.
Speaker A:In general.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:We are going to talk about a thing called seeker sensitive.
Speaker A:Right now, the minute I said that, especially if you live in Atlanta or any major metro area, you know, you may be familiar with larger mega churches that, you know, adopt this kind of philosophy as who they are.
Speaker A:We do have a big one here, you know, in Atlanta that does that, Eddie Stanley's churches.
Speaker A:But, you know, this whole movement was started up in Chicago.
Speaker A:Well, close to Chicago, up there with Bill Hybels.
Speaker A:And Willow Creek.
Speaker A:And you know, decades ago, they decided to adopt this focus that said we are, you know, we are going to be very sensitive to the Seeker.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:This is our mission, this is our passion.
Speaker A:And, and they programmed everything around that.
Speaker A:So, you know, we want to talk about how are we seeker sensitive or not.
Speaker B:So I think we need to explain what it, what a Seeker is.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker B:What does that mean in this context?
Speaker A:Yeah, well, I think, you know, Seeker, you got it.
Speaker A:You got something there.
Speaker A:Maybe you want to expound on.
Speaker C:I think we're all Seekers because we're all looking for something.
Speaker C:And so anybody who's searching or looking for anything, not just God, but just looking for more purpose, more meaning, they are a Seeker.
Speaker C:A Seeker of, of treasure, life's treasures.
Speaker A:Just do.
Speaker A:Let us write in that one, man.
Speaker A:Okay, here we are.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:And, and another.
Speaker B:And an additional perspective is you're curious about God or faith.
Speaker A:Sure.
Speaker B:Right?
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:That's definitely a component you're seeking.
Speaker C:So it's an awareness that there is more.
Speaker C:Then what's something.
Speaker C:There's something more calling me.
Speaker B:Exactly right.
Speaker A:And you don't know what it is necessarily, or maybe you got an inkling whatever it might be, but you are.
Speaker A:Here's the thing about being a Seeker.
Speaker A:You got to be open minded.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:If you're going to come into being, looking for something and you are going to bring your biases completely and you're going to bring your worldview and it's unchangeable and it's not, you know, you're going to bump up against this and I don't like it.
Speaker A:The chances are you really aren't seeking anything.
Speaker A:You're just needing confirmation of where you already are.
Speaker C:Confirmation bias for sure.
Speaker C:You said you don't know what it is.
Speaker C:I think that's a requirement.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker C:I don't know what it is, but I know there's something pulling.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:So I need to make something clear for all of my Harry Potter friends out there.
Speaker B:This is not a position on a Quidditch team.
Speaker B:There is one called Seeker.
Speaker C:Yes, there is.
Speaker B:So I just kind of called myself out as being a really big, geeky Harry Potter person.
Speaker B:But that's okay.
Speaker B:This is something different.
Speaker A:This is.
Speaker C:I love you a little bit more now.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:It's still.
Speaker A:When you go into Dragon Con and all that kind of stuff, it's crazy.
Speaker A:He sends us pictures.
Speaker A:All right, so, you know, let's just talk about maybe some things that we can recognize that already exist just so you can get a Little bit of context here about seeker sensitiveness.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And we've already talked a little bit about some modern churches that have adopted that mantra of seeker sensitive.
Speaker A:And you know, the funny thing about it is, though, and I was realized this this week when we were putting this together, like, new thought, which are old thoughts.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:This idea of seeker sensitive is millennia old.
Speaker A:I mean, it's not like it's something brand new.
Speaker A:What was Jesus?
Speaker A:He was secret sensitive, wasn't he?
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:So, I mean, you know, you can go, well to the, to the Older Testament.
Speaker A:I.
Speaker A:You can go to any religion.
Speaker A:I mean, you know, these are old, old concepts.
Speaker A:And the way that the world works.
Speaker C:We know, we use in our community.
Speaker C:I never heard the term seeker sensitive till this podcast, but we've used the term beginner's mind, Buddhist term.
Speaker C:Beginner's eyes, beginner's ears, beginner's heart.
Speaker C:To look as if you're looking for the first time.
Speaker C:And that, in essence, creates that seeker's consciousness.
Speaker A:Yeah, yeah, I love that.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:That's awesome.
Speaker C:But Jesus, you know, you mentioned Jesus, he went looking for the seekers.
Speaker C:He gathered around him people that were questioning, that were challenging life a little bit and willing to dance on the edge.
Speaker C:Yes.
Speaker A:And had an open mind about what might be, you know.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:That's just amazing.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker C:He also called out the seeker.
Speaker C:They had an open mind, but then they start to close down and he'd open it again.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:You knuckleheads.
Speaker C:What are you going to say, Coach?
Speaker B:Yeah, no, I was going to ask.
Speaker B:I was going to say that we're talking about churches and how are we.
Speaker A:General.
Speaker B:How are we.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:Seeker sensitive in that way.
Speaker B:And I think one of the things that churches do that are.
Speaker B:That would say they're seeker sensitive is they.
Speaker B:They create.
Speaker B:They do a really good job, I think, of creating, like a safe space to explore your.
Speaker B:Your faith or explore God or what, Whatever it is you're.
Speaker B:You're seeking or you think you're seeking.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:They do a pretty good job and doing that through a community.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:That's the whole point.
Speaker B:You're not doing this alone.
Speaker B:Like, let's do this together and kind of see where we head right on the journey.
Speaker A:Well, yeah, you've opened up the door that says it's okay to ask questions, it's okay to doubt, it's okay to wrestle.
Speaker A:It's okay.
Speaker A:And there's people in that church, leadership wise now, that are sensitive to that.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:They're sensitive to how you feel.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:And that's a.
Speaker A:That's a huge component of people being willing to take the next step, being willing to lean in a little bit, even if it's foreign, even if they.
Speaker A:I'm not sure about this.
Speaker C:They're coming in the front doors and they have the radar, the antenna out that you like to say.
Speaker C:And it's like, is this safe?
Speaker C:Before they're ever going to be a part of a family or a community, is this safe?
Speaker C:And if the answer is no, because there is not a seeker's mentality, that consciousness, they're out the back.
Speaker B:Well, everybody is welcome, in my experience, in this, this kind of a church.
Speaker B:And here's the thing I want people to hear, like all of you that.
Speaker B:That believe in God or maybe are wondering who God is, or maybe you're like, I don't know if I believe or not.
Speaker B:There's no question that's too big for God.
Speaker B:You can ask anything you want.
Speaker A:Absolutely.
Speaker B:God can handle that.
Speaker C:I like to carry though that idea.
Speaker C:Every church will tell you that you're welcome, and that's absolutely a true statement.
Speaker C:But then there's the next step.
Speaker C:I think what you're talking about, you're not just welcome here, you're accepted here.
Speaker C:And I think that's the next level that some places don't go to.
Speaker B:Here's what I love about these kinds of places.
Speaker B:Like, they want to hear your questions, especially the tough ones, and they want to explore that and have a conversation.
Speaker B:Like, in my experience, those, those big questions are never shut down.
Speaker B:It's always like, okay, let's talk about it.
Speaker B:Now.
Speaker B:It doesn't mean that necessarily the people that are in the conversation believe where you're headed, but it doesn't matter.
Speaker B:They're having the conversation to explore what, you know, whatever that person is seeking, you know, whatever it might be, this.
Speaker C:Is a safe place to ask a question.
Speaker C:And questions lead to better answers.
Speaker A:Well, yes, and you've got to also have the right type of, and I'm going to call them leadership, but you also have to have the right kind of leadership that casts this vision that helps teach other people how to accept people right where they're at.
Speaker A:Because a lot of people can't do that.
Speaker A:And it's not.
Speaker A:They don't want to do that.
Speaker A:It's just that they have never learned how to deal with all those nuances, you know, that.
Speaker A:That people come to the table with.
Speaker A:And it's so easy to land the plane and say, oh, that, you know, that doesn't work here.
Speaker A:Okay, oh, sorry.
Speaker A:Okay, now that you're gonna have to change your thinking on that deal.
Speaker B:You're talking about my childhood, churches I was in.
Speaker B:You know, you can't ask that question, Sister Mary Elizabeth.
Speaker B:Yeah, why not?
Speaker B:Why can't I ask that question?
Speaker C:Well, you know, because we're so afraid.
Speaker C:We're so threatened by questions.
Speaker C:That's my childhood.
Speaker C:If you ask a question, it is now a threat.
Speaker C:If you ask a question, it's a challenge.
Speaker C:And so rephrasing idea of what questions are.
Speaker C:No, it's curiosity.
Speaker A:Yeah, it's.
Speaker C:I want to explore.
Speaker C:I want to adventure with you.
Speaker C:Not to challenge you, but to have the two of us grow together.
Speaker B:Yeah, right.
Speaker C:That's the kind of environment I think you're talking about.
Speaker C:And I believe that's as far as churches go.
Speaker C:Those are the churches that grow.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:And they have a great impact as well.
Speaker A:You know, they wouldn't be growing if there wasn't some sort of value that comes from it as well.
Speaker A:Some change, some spiritual awakening, whatever that, you know, whatever you want to call it.
Speaker A:For each individual, the quality of the.
Speaker C:Environment will always be determined by the quality of the questions that are welcome.
Speaker A:There you go.
Speaker A:I love that.
Speaker A:Oh, that might be a meme.
Speaker B:We haven't had like a meme in a long time.
Speaker C:We haven't.
Speaker B:That's.
Speaker B:That would be a good point.
Speaker A:I like that, man.
Speaker A:That's.
Speaker C:I've only got 400 more to keep up with you guys.
Speaker A:Yeah, okay, that's true.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So, you know, modern churches, they've coined this ancient seeker mentality.
Speaker A:And one of the major things in, in the Jesus's day or even, you know, post, you know, him and his life was community.
Speaker A:You know, it's.
Speaker A:People are seeking community.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:Just, just.
Speaker A:I just want to be around some people that, you know, I can feel comfort.
Speaker A:We can have some fun and I can still learn and grow is what the Rev was talking about.
Speaker A:That's, I think at the core of it, what most people want.
Speaker A:Now, there might be other reasons for you want to go to a particular church, but deep down, I think if you don't satisfy those cravings, those deeper things, then I don't care what kind of music you have or, you know, anything like that.
Speaker A:It's not meeting the core visceral need that everybody has.
Speaker B:I mean, think about it.
Speaker B:How many, how many places can you think of where you can go and you can.
Speaker B:Can ask anything you want to ask and not feel judged by asking.
Speaker C:Exactly.
Speaker B:Even if even, you know, and even if there's like body language.
Speaker B:You know, you could be judged with body language or eye.
Speaker B:Or eye rolls.
Speaker B:We were talking about some eye rolls earlier.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:In the pre show.
Speaker B:But yeah, I mean it, that, that's what I love about this is being able to just kind of flush it out no matter what how crazy it may be sound to them or even to you.
Speaker B:You might think it's a crazy question.
Speaker B:But I'll tell you what, every time I've asked what I thought was the craziest question.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:Somebody else said, oh, I had that same question.
Speaker C:I was just afraid to ask it.
Speaker B:And I was afraid to ask it.
Speaker B:Thank you for asking it.
Speaker B:Yep.
Speaker A:You know, and you know, I know, I know this because I've seen it time and time again.
Speaker A:Some of you out there may be saying, well, yeah, that's what I was hoping was going to happen.
Speaker A:But you know, the.
Speaker A:Yeah, but my experience wasn't that same thing.
Speaker A:Okay, here's what happened when I tried to voice something and I've been there.
Speaker A:I mean this is not, you know, this is personal experience that said.
Speaker A:Oh, sorry, that point of view doesn't fly here.
Speaker B:We call that a bad church experience.
Speaker A:Exactly.
Speaker A:You know, so just understand that there isn't necessarily everybody.
Speaker A:It doesn't make, you got to give it some time and you have to, you have to be willing to expose yourself to some of that stuff that might be a little adverse to you.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:I mean it doesn't make the place bad until you've had a chance to experience it a little bit more.
Speaker A:I'm just saying.
Speaker C:Well, you know, I was, I believe in the God of second and third chances.
Speaker C:You know, if you're giving a church one shot and you have an encounter with one person who's closed minded and you make a judgment about the whole.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker C:That's very narrow on your part.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker C:Don't go back to that person.
Speaker C:Go find somebody.
Speaker C:Because there are good people everywhere if.
Speaker A:You look for them.
Speaker A:Absolutely.
Speaker C:Even in closed minded environments, there are good people.
Speaker C:And that's, you know, was it somebody said, I'd rather stand inside the church and kick the doors open than beating on the outside trying to get in.
Speaker C:Go find the people on the inside that are waiting for you to show up.
Speaker C:That's like, I want to meet you in the questions.
Speaker C:I'm going to meet you there.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker C:Give it a second or third chance.
Speaker B:I think that's, I love that.
Speaker A:You know that that's.
Speaker B:Amen to that.
Speaker B:Rev.
Speaker C:Hallelujah.
Speaker C:Hallelujah.
Speaker B:We don't Say that here, but amen to that.
Speaker A:That'll preach.
Speaker A:Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker A:Well, it's, it's, it's an interesting journey to evaluate who you are and what you're trying to accomplish when you're part of a church.
Speaker A:And if you have anything to say about it, all right, certainly.
Speaker A:But even if you don't and you get into the smaller groups that most churches have, it's still a very important thing for you to go into that thing with an open mind that says, you know, I'm going to love this.
Speaker A:No matter who's in here, I'm going to love them, you know, as the best that I can, and I'm not going to try to force my theology down their throat.
Speaker C:Well, take theology out of the equation.
Speaker C:I've had this conversation with senior homes or senior citizen centers.
Speaker C:Yeah, no, I went to that senior center once, and they were terrible, awful people.
Speaker C:I said, who'd you talk to?
Speaker C:Only talk to one guy.
Speaker C:And they make a judgment about the whole senior center, you know, as if the blanket's been thrown.
Speaker C:It's a terrible place.
Speaker C:And I think the, the principle you're teaching and talking about isn't just churches, right?
Speaker C:It's universal.
Speaker C:Every single environment you go into, can there be a cultivated seeker consciousness?
Speaker C:I think there can, and sometimes you have to be the one that creates it.
Speaker A:That's where we're going here.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:Because it's not just about a church, for sure.
Speaker C:That's our context, because we all do that.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:This is.
Speaker A:I mean, this is an example, you know, we're trying to give you.
Speaker A:Oh, here's how it fleshes itself out right now in the world.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:But we're also going to come because we're wise guys, right?
Speaker A:I mean, we get you to think differently.
Speaker B:So we've been told.
Speaker C:So we tell ourselves.
Speaker C:Often.
Speaker A:I try to reinforce that in these guys, but, you know, they.
Speaker A:They look at me like I'm not sure what you're talking about.
Speaker A:Okay, so, you know, it's more than just church.
Speaker A:Absolutely, absolutely.
Speaker A:So when you're seeker sensitive, what are you seeking?
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:If it's not church, let's just.
Speaker A:Like Stu is saying, let's just.
Speaker A:And Richard, let's just take this off.
Speaker A:Oh, there's a little Freudian slip, Rev.
Speaker A:Sorry.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker C:That's okay.
Speaker C:If you compare me to that guy, I'm feeling really good.
Speaker A:So, you know, we are talking life here now, not just the church.
Speaker A:All right?
Speaker A:So we're going to make that transition or.
Speaker A:But as you're seeking, I'M going to make one just general comment.
Speaker A:I had a little idea that you've heard this before and I'm just using an example to try to get this point out.
Speaker A:Maybe it's not the greatest one in the world, but you've heard this.
Speaker A:Choose a job you love and you will never have to work a day in your life.
Speaker B:Okay, you know what I, what I learned about this quote, it's often attributed to Confucius having said this.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:At which on the surface can make sense.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:But when.
Speaker A:If you're seeking this job that you love, which there's nothing wrong with that.
Speaker A:Okay, but that's a seeking on your part.
Speaker A:Sometimes it just doesn't work out quite like you would want it to.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And so you got to be open minded enough as well to say, well, I'm seeking X, Y, but maybe I'm only getting Y in the equation right now.
Speaker A:Maybe I'm only getting a part of that.
Speaker A:But you know what?
Speaker A:I'm going to enter in and I'm going to pursue it to the best of my ability.
Speaker A:In other words, if you have a seeker mentality, don't close it off, that it's finite, you know, oh, this is the thing right here.
Speaker A:I got it in a box.
Speaker A:That's what I'm seeking.
Speaker A:And anything that doesn't fit that little, you know, description, then so many jobs.
Speaker C:And so many relationships have been lost because it didn't match the perfect thing I have set up in my mind.
Speaker C:And so I walk away from it.
Speaker C:And maybe the best opportunity was with that relationship or that job.
Speaker C:I've got the song in my head.
Speaker C:Love the one you're with.
Speaker C:Love the one you're with.
Speaker C:Because the better job will come if you can't find the love for where you are.
Speaker C:You're never going to get that other one.
Speaker B:Well, let's say you even had that right.
Speaker B:And.
Speaker B:But no matter how you had the perfect job, but no matter how passionate you are about it, there's always going to be challenges and stress and I mean it's.
Speaker B:You know what I mean?
Speaker B:That's going to happen.
Speaker B:Yeah, it can fall out of favor.
Speaker B:So I wrote something down that I thought might be a better way to say this.
Speaker B:And this is in no diff dis on Confucius at all because I don't claim to be here.
Speaker B:Okay, but what if we said it like this?
Speaker B:Find work that aligns with your passions, strengths and values.
Speaker B:But others understand that even the most rewarding job will have difficult days.
Speaker A:Okay?
Speaker A:I can go along with that.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:That's wisdom.
Speaker C:I met anybody who loves every part of their job 100%.
Speaker A:There's all.
Speaker C:It's just part of life.
Speaker A:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker A:And then that's why you have to, I think, just be careful that you don't get, you know, disillusioned in your seeking, or maybe you are on the wrong path.
Speaker A:But don't stop seeking.
Speaker A:You know, don't.
Speaker A:Just don't do that.
Speaker A:All right?
Speaker A:Because you will close yourself off.
Speaker A:There's a Japanese saying that's called ikigai, and you could look that up.
Speaker A:I'm not going to go into it on this podcast, but, you know, that will talk about your life's passion and, you know, how you want to give your time away and how not to give your time away.
Speaker A:It's as much about what you should do as well as what you shouldn't do.
Speaker C:Well, I tell you, at the risk of a bunny trail here, we're using seeking in the context of out here.
Speaker C:The job, the relationship, the experience, the church.
Speaker B:You're coming inside.
Speaker C:I'm telling you, it's got to come inside, baby.
Speaker B:I knew it.
Speaker C:He's come.
Speaker C:Nothing else.
Speaker C:I am consistent.
Speaker A:Yes, you are, and we love you for it.
Speaker A:So that's a great lead in to the second half of the podcast.
Speaker A:Without a doubt.
Speaker C:Be the change you want to see.
Speaker A:There it is.
Speaker A:So we're gonna.
Speaker A:We're gonna take a deep breath here with that and beautiful wisdom, and then we're going to come back and we'll talk about how we might want to shatter some of the norms now that you might look at when it comes to seeking.
Speaker A:So hang on for a little bit.
Speaker A:We'll be right back.
Speaker A:Thanks.
Speaker B:So we ran out of juice.
Speaker A:Yeah, I'm.
Speaker A:I got it right here.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:I got it.
Speaker B:I was gonna ask maybe.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:Rev there to do it, and he can.
Speaker B:He can.
Speaker B:If.
Speaker B:Unless you can see it.
Speaker C:What do you have so far?
Speaker A:23.
Speaker C:Okay.
Speaker C:So you want another 15, 14, 15 minutes or so?
Speaker A:Yeah, I mean, you know, if this is a little shorter, if we, you know, then that's okay, too, you know, obviously, if we.
Speaker B:Well, we could spend a little time on this stuff.
Speaker A:Well, yeah, you're getting.
Speaker C:You're getting to the juice, I think.
Speaker B:Yeah, this is good.
Speaker A:So, you know, another, you know, 13, 14 minutes maybe, something like that.
Speaker A:We're in the mid-30s.
Speaker A:That would be great.
Speaker C:You know, you just say, ready, set.
Speaker A:Go, and I'll hit them.
Speaker B:I'm in the upper 50s, by the way.
Speaker B:I'm not in the mid-30s anymore, although I feel like I am.
Speaker C:Oh, my 50s.
Speaker C:The good old days.
Speaker A:Well, guys, okay, I got it on both of you, and it's all good.
Speaker A:You know, every single season is.
Speaker A:Is good.
Speaker A:You know, it really is.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker A:All right, so let's come back.
Speaker A:Here we go.
Speaker B:Shatter some norms.
Speaker A:Shatter some norms.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:I wish I had sort of like, I should have it on here on the.
Speaker A:You know, the little, you know, an explosion.
Speaker B:Yeah, we need an explosion, I think.
Speaker B:Yeah, I'm gonna get something.
Speaker A:I'm gonna put that on.
Speaker B:We need sound effects.
Speaker C:Shattered ceiling sound like.
Speaker A:Yeah, I did have some glass that was.
Speaker A:I had at one point shattering.
Speaker A:You know, a little tinkling.
Speaker A:That would be good.
Speaker A:But I didn't know if.
Speaker A:It didn't sound like anybody would really recognize what it was.
Speaker A:It wasn't that definitive enough that they would go, oh, that's breaking glass.
Speaker A:They're shattering something.
Speaker A:It just didn't quite sound that way.
Speaker B:So I'm sure we can find one that would sound like that.
Speaker A:I think so, either, if we have to.
Speaker C:I'm seeking that sound.
Speaker A:Crash.
Speaker A:Okay, let's just bust.
Speaker A:All right, here we go.
Speaker A:All right, gang, welcome back to the Wise Guys podcast, where in this episode, we are talking about being or seeing or engaging in being seeker sensitive.
Speaker A:And we just spent the.
Speaker A:The first part of the podcast talking about, you know, some of the ways that we already see it going on around us.
Speaker A:Definitely in churches, that we see that mentality and that programming and that focus, but.
Speaker A:But those are things.
Speaker A:And I think we ended the first half with the Rev saying, we gotta move inward now.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:It's time to move in.
Speaker A:Because a lot of seeking happens personally happens within us.
Speaker A:All right?
Speaker A:So at the key, I think the seeking, if we're going to talk about expanding like we have been, a lot of it has to do with relationships, you know, because the minute you get so focused on your thing that you're seeking, you can really turn inward really easily, and then it becomes kind of narcissistic, or you fold down in yourself and you're doing all kinds of mantras and you're doing all sorts of other kinds of stuff, but it's all about you.
Speaker A:Okay?
Speaker A:And we might.
Speaker A:There might be a song.
Speaker A:I'll get Stu going here.
Speaker A:There might be a song that had to be you.
Speaker A:I knew the Rev would have one in there, man.
Speaker A:Okay, so, you know, here's what we'll start this out with.
Speaker A:We're going to shatter some of your norms.
Speaker A:That's what we do.
Speaker A:But our goal is for you to ponder if it's something shattered and think about it now.
Speaker A:You may want to put it back together just exactly like it was.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:That's up to you.
Speaker A:But what we're hoping is that in that shattering, you're going to go find something that's even more beautiful, that's even something that's just more amazing than whatever it was that got broken.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So our first nugget here might be to seek new ways to engage with people and develop in that as you want to do that.
Speaker A:It means, I think, we think you need to develop a greater sense of your emotional intelligence.
Speaker A:You know, maybe some of you don't know what that means.
Speaker A:You can look it up and we're not going to go into a whole emotional intelligence thing on this episode, but one of the components of emotion, having a higher emotional intelligence is your social skills.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:Developing your social skills because again, what are we talking about?
Speaker A:Relationships.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:And so, you know, developing how you can.
Speaker A:Well, you can relate to other people and be sensitive to their seeking, let alone your own.
Speaker C:I'm constantly asking myself the question, am I an open environment or am I enclosed?
Speaker C:Environment is in my relationships and interactions with people.
Speaker C:It's easy to go unconscious and become closed down.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker C:And it's easy to spot it in other people.
Speaker C:But the reality I need to ask myself, have I come into this situation with an open heart or a closed mind?
Speaker C:And I tell you, that distinction is really important.
Speaker C:And the good in my life has come from asking that question, being more open and receptive to the seekers, and being a seeker myself, I really want to understand where you're coming from.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker C:I really want to know you.
Speaker B:Oh, yeah, that's great point.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:I mean, if you're seeking, you're going to be able to relate to other seekers better.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:You know, I mean, it's natural.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And mdu.
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker B:And you can look.
Speaker B:You can have a look that is like an open.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Look.
Speaker B:Like it's body language.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:Like people, you know, people.
Speaker B:And as soon as I say this out there, people.
Speaker B:You know what I'm talking about.
Speaker B:You've seen people that you're like, I'm not walking up to that person.
Speaker B:There's no way.
Speaker B:But then there's other people.
Speaker B:Like, wow, like, what do they got going on?
Speaker B:You smile or you're inviting.
Speaker B:Like, I often had wondered what my, like, resting face.
Speaker B:And I know it has a little bit of a smile on it because when I walk by people, people always smile at me.
Speaker B:And I used to think, why are people smiling at me?
Speaker B:And then I, I sat for a long time in front of the mirror.
Speaker C:Hitting on you.
Speaker B:That could be.
Speaker B:I sat in front of the mirror one day and for a long time and I was like, wow, I got like a little smile.
Speaker B:Like, that's cool.
Speaker B:Like, I'm glad I have that.
Speaker A:Well, it's.
Speaker B:So I'm just saying when you're out there, like, absolutely.
Speaker B:Don't be afraid to look at people.
Speaker B:Look them in the eye to, to just like, you know, take a deep breath and feel like, invite them in energetically, you know, and if they want.
Speaker A:To say smile really helps them.
Speaker B:Oh, for sure.
Speaker B:They'll smile back at your eyes glisten.
Speaker A:I mean, it's, it's all kinds of other stuff.
Speaker C:But you, you probably got what I'm going to call resting Christ face.
Speaker C:You probably cultivated that.
Speaker C:Maybe it wasn't always that way.
Speaker C:See, look at, he's smiling.
Speaker C:It's a natural thing.
Speaker C:He's not even thinking about it.
Speaker C:Because you spent some time intentionally being that environment.
Speaker A:Well, yeah, I heard this story the other day about this whole resting face thing.
Speaker A:And I didn't see this, I don't know, but I heard that one episode of Oprah.
Speaker A:What she did was she panned the audience.
Speaker A:They didn't know what was going on.
Speaker A:I mean, they just had a camera that was panning the audience.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:And then they started talking about resting face, you know, and there was a whole conversation about that.
Speaker A:And then they played the pan and then everybody panicked.
Speaker C:Oh my God.
Speaker A:What is.
Speaker A:My God.
Speaker A:You know, but it really gave them, you know, a heads up to say, that's me.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:Oh my gosh, look at that.
Speaker A:You know, and so if you need to sit in front of the mirror, sit for the mirror.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:But, but, but it matters.
Speaker A:This is the point.
Speaker A:We're trying to get it.
Speaker A:If you want to shatter some of your norms, if you want to be more winsome to seekers as you're seeking, then work on your resting face.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:That's one component.
Speaker A:Right, right.
Speaker A:And you know, ask some open ended questions.
Speaker A:And what, I mean, here's the core to that.
Speaker A:You got to be in conversation with somebody in order to ask open ended questions.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:You know, it doesn't do any good to ask one of yourself.
Speaker A:All right?
Speaker A:So you gotta be with, with other people.
Speaker B:If this is good, that's, hey, we're here with people.
Speaker B:I mean, we're not meant to be alone.
Speaker B:No, no, no, never the intent, no.
Speaker A:So you got to ask, when you're asking, you ask open ended questions that, that, that lead can, can lead to more to know, an open conversation.
Speaker A:But if your conversation with somebody is yes, no, you know, I mean, you know, you can answer it with one word answer or something like that.
Speaker A:You're not really developing a conversation or way that anybody's going to get to.
Speaker C:Well, you know, there are people out there because I used to be.
Speaker C:I am pretty shy, basically, and introvert.
Speaker C:I know you don't like that I am an introverted guy.
Speaker C:And I realized that people really appreciated it when I didn't know what to say.
Speaker C:And I said that I don't know what to say.
Speaker C:Tell me more.
Speaker B:Yeah, well, that's saying something.
Speaker B:Tell me more.
Speaker C:I'm interested in you, but being totally honest is an open book.
Speaker C:I don't know what to say, but I'm still interested.
Speaker A:Well, that's an icebreaker.
Speaker B:Exactly.
Speaker A:So you got to find these different.
Speaker A:Whatever works for you.
Speaker A:You know, we're not going to say, oh, this is the way to do it, but think about it.
Speaker A:It needs to be a conscious thing to.
Speaker A:When it's not conscious anymore, it's just who you are.
Speaker A:But it's, you know, you got to cultivate that and you have to develop it.
Speaker A:And so in the beginning, what are icebreakers?
Speaker A:What are some kinds of questions or things that you can inquire about the.
Speaker C:And it will be uncomfortable until it isn't.
Speaker B:Well, here, here's how I, I see this.
Speaker B:You, you look for something that you have in common.
Speaker A:Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker B:What?
Speaker B:And it could be anything.
Speaker B:And then you become interested.
Speaker B:You don't become interesting.
Speaker B:But look, I gotta tell a story.
Speaker B:I told this in a pre show, but I, I had, at one point, I was wearing Vibram toe shoes.
Speaker B:Like, that's all I ever wore.
Speaker A:I remember.
Speaker B:I mean, yeah, it was the only shoe I ever wore.
Speaker B:For years I was doing this and I actually wrote a blog post that said.
Speaker B:I wrote a blog that said the title of it was My Toe Shoes have More Friends than I Do.
Speaker B:And it was true.
Speaker B:Because this is what would happen.
Speaker B:I'd be walking down the street, you name it, any place I was, somebody would look down and instantly want to start talking to me about my shoes.
Speaker B:They wouldn't even look me in the eye.
Speaker B:They're looking at my shoes, which is why I said they have more friends than I do.
Speaker B:And we would start a conversation.
Speaker B:I can't even tell you how many conversations I got into.
Speaker B:Just because I had those shoes on.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:So they saw something and it gave them a way to connect with me and start interacting and.
Speaker B:And I'm saying it, you know, it could be your shoes.
Speaker B:It could be anything.
Speaker B:It could be, well, something.
Speaker B:You heard them say.
Speaker A:Dogs and babies are typical for that kind of stuff.
Speaker A:Don't go out there.
Speaker B:That's the easy one.
Speaker A:Don't get a baby, though.
Speaker A:Don't.
Speaker B:You can get a dog, though.
Speaker B:You can take a dog for a while.
Speaker C:You can borrow my dog if you'd like to.
Speaker C:Just.
Speaker B:You could actually borrow a baby.
Speaker B:If you're single out there and you're a man.
Speaker B:Borrow a baby.
Speaker B:You will get a lot.
Speaker B:You'll get a lot of that.
Speaker C:Just got a little creepy.
Speaker C:We're not giving.
Speaker B:Dating, either one.
Speaker B:Men or women.
Speaker B:Either one can do that.
Speaker C:That's right.
Speaker A:So you'll find those.
Speaker A:But.
Speaker A:But it's an intentional thing on your part.
Speaker A:So, like what Stu was saying with his shoes, they would come up and start asking him about the shoes.
Speaker A:Now, what does he do with that asking?
Speaker A:Okay, he can either go, yeah, those are my shoes.
Speaker A:Excuse me, I'm busy right now.
Speaker A:Pardon me.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:And walk away.
Speaker A:Or he can then use that as an inroad to have a conversation, whatever the conversation might be.
Speaker A:But you got to take that next step, all right?
Speaker A:You got to be willing and vulnerable and get out there a little bit.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:And you have to be aware of their social skills.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:Because if their social skills are not quite, you know, I'm going to say developed, but I'm not going to try to judge somebody, but I'm going to say if they're not practicing some of this stuff that we're talking about, sometimes I can rub you the wrong way, you know, and you just want to stiff arm them and you just want to walk.
Speaker C:I've watched so many conversations where the very extroverted person is just.
Speaker C:I'm going to pour myself on you, and the person's backing out of the room as quickly as they can.
Speaker C:You know, shyness is a real thing.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker C:You've got to be sensitive.
Speaker C:But if you're having a secret consciousness, you're going to read the clues coming to you.
Speaker B:Well, yeah, you got it.
Speaker B:You got it.
Speaker B:The way I see that, Rev, is you got to meet people where they are.
Speaker B:So, you know, and in my world, I have Stu's school of life, and people that I come across, I put into school.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker B:And I will never tell you if anybody's going to Ask me what level of school I have you in.
Speaker B:But it helps me.
Speaker B:It helps me to be able to meet people where they are.
Speaker B:Understanding that.
Speaker B:It just works for me.
Speaker B:But it's a way to connect with.
Speaker B:With people where they are.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:You know, I'm not trying to bring them to where I am.
Speaker B:I want to meet them where they are.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:So.
Speaker B:So they feel comfortable and I can have a good conversation.
Speaker C:You know what's beautiful about that?
Speaker C:Let's put them in second grade.
Speaker C:You meet somebody that you've assessed, they're in second grade.
Speaker C:Your willingness to be present with them, to be interested in them, they're going to graduate to third grade, all in that brief moment of con.
Speaker B:I like that.
Speaker B:And I haven't thought about that.
Speaker A:That's good, right?
Speaker A:And what's beautiful about it, and I know Stu's approach to this, so isn't with the intention in mind of getting them to third grade?
Speaker C:Nope.
Speaker B:No.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:You're just meeting the people.
Speaker B:I just want to connect.
Speaker C:I want to connect with you, and I want to create a safe environment for you to be you, because I see you, I know you, and I respect you in second, third, fourth grade.
Speaker C:Doesn't really matter then.
Speaker C:The natural evolution happens to third grade just because.
Speaker C:Because I'm safe.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Well, another thing about emotional intelligence is good eye contact.
Speaker A:I mean, there's body language.
Speaker A:Stu is already talking about body language.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Your resting face, but also eye contact.
Speaker A:You know, people, and especially shy people, you don't want to intimidate them, okay, by staring at them, but you do want to show interest in them.
Speaker A:And it's very difficult for anybody to believe you're sincere and are interested in them if you're looking somewhere else.
Speaker B:The eyes tell stories.
Speaker B:Oh, they tell stories.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:You could have somebody smiling and looking at you, and you look in their eyes, you're like, there is something else going on.
Speaker B:You know, so just the sensitivity.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:Right there.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:And you have to start to learn to engage so that you can start to see these things.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:And then the other thing we always hear about, you know, and this is common, but you know, the whole listening thing.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:The whole just let me listen to you and not try to butt in or try to, you know, compete or anything like that.
Speaker A:When the time is right, then you speak.
Speaker A:It doesn't mean you're silent, but the most thing is to be sensitive to them and listen.
Speaker B:This is so hard to do.
Speaker B:I actually did a whole weekend seminar that was kind of revolving around this.
Speaker B:And one of the things they had us do.
Speaker B:It's about like.
Speaker B:Like clearing your mind when somebody is speaking to you and truly hearing what they're.
Speaker B:What you're.
Speaker B:What they're saying instead of sitting there thinking, okay, what am I going to respond to?
Speaker B:Oh, I thought about this thing.
Speaker B:I want to tell them that.
Speaker B:And you're.
Speaker B:You're piling up all this stuff in your head and not listening.
Speaker A:Right, right.
Speaker B:It's kind of like you're putting it all on the shelf and oh, I'm going to say all these things instead of just leaving that shelf empty.
Speaker B:And then when it comes time for you to say something, then you just.
Speaker B:Whatever comes, comes.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:But that is so hard to do.
Speaker B:You have to practice doing this.
Speaker B:You want to keep thinking.
Speaker C:And I want to go back to that idea of, oh, I've made a judgment because you're not looking at me.
Speaker C:You're smiling, but you're not looking at me.
Speaker C:You're not making contact.
Speaker C:I can judge that.
Speaker C:Then I'm not a seeker energy.
Speaker C:Or I can go, what.
Speaker C:What difficulty, what pain, what uncomfortableness might be across the table from me right now.
Speaker C:That's a compassionate.
Speaker C:Which is the open environment.
Speaker C:Not.
Speaker C:He's not.
Speaker C:He's not genuine.
Speaker C:He's not sincere.
Speaker C:Well, maybe he's sincerely hurting.
Speaker C:And okay, that eye contact maybe just too much of him right now.
Speaker C:Meet him in the valley where they are sensitive.
Speaker B:Exactly.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:I guess I was kind of looking at that.
Speaker A:The reverse that if I'm going to have a conversation with somebody, I want to try to practice my presence.
Speaker A:But if they're not looking at me and they're wherever they are and wherever there is happening in their life.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:You want to be demanding.
Speaker A:Hey, look at me.
Speaker A:Hey, excuse me.
Speaker A:Are you with me?
Speaker A:Hello?
Speaker A:Yeah, so.
Speaker A:But you make a really good point again, that we need to be sensitive to them.
Speaker C:Well, you know, and being a secret consciousness, you may plant a seed and they may walk away for sure because they're too uncomfortable.
Speaker C:But that seed was planted.
Speaker C:They're going away.
Speaker C:That guy was safe enough.
Speaker C:He didn't judge me.
Speaker C:He was open.
Speaker C:He was receptive.
Speaker C:I might come back to him another time.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:I don't think everybody's like who I thought they were.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker A:You know, but that's a good.
Speaker B:That's a good rev.
Speaker B:You're making such a big point because there's energies we all have and everybody knows has had this experience where you walk in a room or somebody walks in a room and you feel something either good or Negative, you know.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:Good or bad or whatever it is you.
Speaker B:Something changes.
Speaker B:So you have that.
Speaker B:That energy.
Speaker B:If you could have like a I care about you energy.
Speaker B:When somebody is.
Speaker B:Is.
Speaker B:Is being that way, the way you're describing, or like, it's okay.
Speaker B:It's safe here.
Speaker B:Like, they will feel that even if they don't say, I'm sure you guys.
Speaker C:Have had this experience.
Speaker C:I have been misjudged.
Speaker C:I consider myself a loving, kind human being.
Speaker C:And if I'm having a bad day or really struggling and I'm struggling with some things right now, and it's like, walk into the room and I'm being judged.
Speaker C:That's not a secret environment.
Speaker C:Help me understand what you're going through, brother, sister, as opposed to, oh, bad energy, negative energy.
Speaker C:That is really hard because you can feel the effect in the environment.
Speaker C:It's like, suspend the judgment and just remain open.
Speaker A:Well, it takes courage.
Speaker C:It takes a lot of courage.
Speaker A:It does take courage, and that's what you got to adopt.
Speaker A:So, you know, we talk about this all the time and have for years about just getting your antennas up.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:Just getting them up to observe, just to be resonating with.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:You can see this in the video.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:But that's really important because you have no idea what's coming next.
Speaker A:For the most part.
Speaker A:None of us do.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:You live in the moment and whatever the next moment is, most of the time, we have no clue.
Speaker A:But if you want to be able to navigate it better, then you get your antennas up and you're sensitive to what's going on around you.
Speaker A:You don't have to think about it then.
Speaker A:It just.
Speaker A:It's natural.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:But it takes courage because then you're also vulnerable.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:When you do that, because you're going to get enter into conversations, you're going to show some of yourself, you know, in the whole equation, and that sometimes gets a little tough.
Speaker C:It requires intimacy.
Speaker C:Into me, see And I might get hurt.
Speaker A:Oh, I like that.
Speaker A:Into me see.
Speaker A:I love that.
Speaker A:That's another meme.
Speaker B:Here we go.
Speaker B:Two in one show.
Speaker B:Come on.
Speaker C:It's not original.
Speaker C:As old as the hills.
Speaker A:It's okay, though.
Speaker A:And lastly, I think I just want to this from a personal experience.
Speaker A:When you're trying to.
Speaker A:To relate to others that are seeking, you know, to be vulnerable to, say, as Rev was talking about, maybe you just don't know.
Speaker A:You just.
Speaker A:You don't really have anything to give them.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Another thing that you can do to really make a connection is an Empathetic.
Speaker A:Oh, yeah.
Speaker A:I've been there.
Speaker A:You know, let me tell you.
Speaker A:You know, in the right way.
Speaker A:Let me tell you a little bit about my story, okay?
Speaker A:And now you're sharing stories without doing what Stu is talking about.
Speaker A:Just can't wait to get in there to tell your story.
Speaker A:All right?
Speaker A:But there becomes a whole nother.
Speaker A:I was seeking somebody like me that's been through something similar to what I've been through.
Speaker A:And right there, boom, you know, you've got a connection.
Speaker A:You know, you can help each other if you're seeking.
Speaker C:Our human race has become so uncomfortable with silence, so uncomfortable with presence.
Speaker C:And so we think we have to fill the words.
Speaker C:And sometimes what that person needs if you're in a secret environment, is just you to be present with them.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker C:I don't need magic words.
Speaker C:I don't need magic, exciting responses.
Speaker C:I just need to be present.
Speaker C:But because we're so uncomfortable with silence, if there's.
Speaker C:Men are the worst at it.
Speaker C:I've got to fill the space.
Speaker C:I've got to fill the space.
Speaker C:And it's like, yeah, that eye contact, that smile.
Speaker C:Is that enough?
Speaker C:In some cases it is.
Speaker C:And don't klutz it up with the wrong words.
Speaker C:Don't have to speak.
Speaker A:Well, the minute you start to overthink this whole thing, then you're gonna try too hard, you know?
Speaker A:I mean, you just gotta learn to be sensitive to the seeker, your inside and outside and be comfortable and love both, you know?
Speaker A:And for me, that also had to learn to love my dragon, as is Joseph Campbell calls it, right?
Speaker A:That you have these things in you that are uggs, you know, that you would just go, ah, gosh, I wish that wasn't way I acted or that I wish that wasn't the way that I.
Speaker A:That I am.
Speaker A:And it.
Speaker A:Once you come to really seek comfort, there's a comfort that you can seek with that part of you.
Speaker A:Lots of stuff changes then.
Speaker A:It doesn't give you an excuse to, you know, be whatever it is you don't want to be.
Speaker A:But it helps you navigate the waters better as you're coming to love yourself a little bit better, right?
Speaker A:So.
Speaker A:So there we are.
Speaker A:There we are.
Speaker A:Seeker sensitive.
Speaker A:Great conversation today, guys.
Speaker A:But, you know, right?
Speaker B:Here we go.
Speaker A:This time, didn't I?
Speaker A:All right, so your ongoing mission.
Speaker A:We have to leave you with this always because there has to be a challenge in here somewhere, right?
Speaker A:Your ongoing mission, should you choose to accept it, is decide to think differently.
Speaker A:Number one, you got to.
Speaker A:You gotta open it up.
Speaker A:Then you need to find.
Speaker A:I said this last week.
Speaker A:I thought it was pretty cool.
Speaker A:You gotta find the people the that are willing to take the red pill.
Speaker A:Okay?
Speaker A:Take the red pill instead of the.
Speaker B:Blue pill and free your mind.
Speaker A:Free your mind, okay?
Speaker A:So you got to find them and they're out there and you will attract them.
Speaker A:They're seeking you.
Speaker A:They're seeking.
Speaker A:There it is.
Speaker A:Seeker sensitive.
Speaker A:There we go.
Speaker A:So we then we strap on our armor and again we, you know, we again we say this every week, but you have to have some grounding in yourself, in your truth, and yet be flexible enough to have that, be open minded about how that might change.
Speaker B:Right?
Speaker A:But you can't be scared of it.
Speaker A:And sometimes it needs to protect you from running rabbit trails or thinking negatively about the situation or about yourself.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:Then we storm the gates, right?
Speaker A:We storm the gates of our own, you know, inflexibility maybe or whatever, you know, stuff that we are paradigm our biases and as well as help other people to get over theirs or at least to loosen up on them a little bit by your example.
Speaker B:As the Rev says, we got to storm the gates of our stinking thinking.
Speaker A:That's it.
Speaker A:He says that.
Speaker A:I love it.
Speaker A:And lastly, what are we gonna do?
Speaker B:Unleash the unthinkable.
Speaker A:Unleash.
Speaker A:Because a lot of this stuff is usually unthinkable, but it's exciting too.
Speaker A:You're gonna love it.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:I'm just telling you right now, it's going to be so much fun.
Speaker A:So that's us for this week, my wise guys.
Speaker C:Thanks for leading the charge, Mac.
Speaker A:Thank you guys.
Speaker A:So much wisdom today.
Speaker A:So interact with us.
Speaker A:We're so happy that you're listening to us.
Speaker A:We actually get our video out there on YouTube and when you think of.
Speaker C:Us this week, picture the coach smiling.
Speaker A:There it is.
Speaker A:Watch the video.
Speaker A:You'll see him.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:No doubt about of both of these guys.
Speaker A:They just got smiles on their face.
Speaker B:No, I got to watch and make sure I was smiling the whole time.
Speaker C:You were, I promise.
Speaker A:All right, well, we love it.
Speaker A:Thanks so much.
Speaker A:Listen to us again then next week when we're going to come at you with another unthinkable conversation.
Speaker A:Thanks a bunch.
